It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
PANTIES FOUND
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
