I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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