Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
