We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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