wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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