can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
The air was thick with penises
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
