week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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