you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Alive.
So much puke
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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