I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize