Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
