Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Four minutes until I can fart!
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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