what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
