We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
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video games are the ultimate cock blocker
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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