And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
