Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
