this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize