his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
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