Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
