Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I supernannyed him into submission
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
