He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
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