Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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