Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize