would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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