Kiss
Puke
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize