508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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