awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
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