i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
i black out too much to be "responsible"
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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