On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
it's like iHOP with fire
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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