i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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