Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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