Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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