matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Green mimosas i think yes
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I have already put on my inside pants.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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