I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
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Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
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He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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