I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
