Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
My ass is underappreciated
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Randomize