If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
His hands were made for my vagina.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize