Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
