Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
