Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
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