she was so not down for the gang bang
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
