he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
