New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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