Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake

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(704): Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake http://tfl.nu/8hsp

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(954): View more from Florida

Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!

(805): View more from California

God Bless America!

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(954): Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day! (805): God Bless America! http://tfl.nu/gnt7

Replies (134) Good night (6677) Bad night (1309)
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(631): View more from New York

im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies

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(631): im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies http://tfl.nu/qgfc

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(225): View more from Louisiana

She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us

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(225): She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us http://tfl.nu/zfzd

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(630): View more from Illinois

The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....

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(630): The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time.... http://tfl.nu/q5xm

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

The Swedes wanted a tensome.

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(832): The Swedes wanted a tensome. http://tfl.nu/8c8i

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.

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(780): My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much. http://tfl.nu/iiov

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(815): View more from Illinois

This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.

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(815): This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro. http://tfl.nu/5jtw

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(954): View more from Florida

Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.

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(954): Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it. http://tfl.nu/slzd

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.

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(615): Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done. http://tfl.nu/9ur9

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(323): View more from California

How did I end up in the pool?!

(480): View more from Arizona

Welcome to ASU

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(323): How did I end up in the pool?! (480): Welcome to ASU http://tfl.nu/zi7q

Replies (8) Good night (2318) Bad night (603)
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(301): View more from Maryland

His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.

(1-301): View more from Maryland

I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.

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(301): His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy. (1-301): I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok. http://tfl.nu/z40b

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend

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(+44): gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend http://tfl.nu/upf3

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.

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(202): Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship. http://tfl.nu/usel

Replies (13) Good night (393) Bad night (2136)
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(440): View more from Ohio

Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie

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(440): Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie http://tfl.nu/g1ng

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