strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
how does that bad decision feel?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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