That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
We are all done wearing pants today
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
