She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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