i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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