Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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