apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize