I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
